did anyone here use an anonymous sperm donor?  if so, are you participating in any kind of donor sibling registry?  i signed up and found out that my son has 9 half-sisters and 7 half-brothers, all between the ages of  1 1/2 and 3 1/2 and .  i don't know about wanting them to meet as children, but i do want my son to have the opportunity to meet them as an adult if he would like. 

at what point would you tell your child/ren about their half-siblings?  we are planning on having one more child, using the same donor, so my son will obviously have that sibling to grow up with.

Help me P101, you're my only hope... Okay you or my family therapist.

I have an 8yo from a previous relationship and even though I've been married two years to my husband and dated him for 3 years prior to marriage my MIL doesn't even want to acknowledge my son unless it is to make a nasty comment about how horribly behaved he is because he won't sit absolutely still and watch boring TV shows and never make any noise at all. She has never gotten him anything for his birthday and has gotten him one Christmas gift that was an obvious re-gift of a watch she got for opening an account at the bank two years ago. She hates me (to the point where she refused to go to my husband and my wedding that was less than a mile from her home) and makes nasty comments whenever she thinks I'm out of earshot and makes obvious backhanded compliments. I ignore her for the most part but one thing I just can't ignore is the obvious favoritism she is doing to my 11mo daughter and neglecting to even try to include my son.

I don't want to go visit her for Christmas as she has made it clear that I and my son are not welcome at her house but my husband and our daughter is. On one hand my son is not going to be with me for Christmas day so he won't be subjected to her nasty comments about me and him. On the other hand I know if we do go that my MIL will have a huge pile of clothes and gifts for my daughter that we will have to bring home and more than likely no gifts for my son.

Is it being too unreasonable to thank her for the gifts but tell her we can't take them since she is not being fair to both siblings? Take the gifts but ask for receipts to exchange them so both siblings will have gifts "from" my MIL? Not go since she doesn't want me there anyway and therefore have no gifts to take back home? Erect an effigy and light it up on her drive?

ETA: My DH has talked to his mother numerous times about this and she promises to change and never does. Often she continues this behavior within moments of being told to stop. I refused to go over there with my son because of her treatment. My MIL is my DH's only remaining parent after his Dad died when he was 12 so he is very reluctant to cuts ties with her. Even though his sister did already because of the same treatment but all the kids are her biological grandkids just the first one was born out of wedlock.

His mom graciously said she won't call the cops on me if I come along with my daughter this year. She also laid down a major guilt trip of how she never gets to see her grandchildren.

Does anyone have any suggestions for a brand of boots for kids with cankles.
I'm thinking I'll have to go with a type with zip up sides, because his calves are too big to fit into slip in boots.

My LO does not sleep well during the day. He is 5.5 months old now. I posted here about it a couple months ago and not much has changed - in fact, it got worse for a few weeks during a sleep regression, that we just now seem to be getting past. He needs to be held to stay asleep for naps, and when I am holding him he will partially wake up a few times and need to be patted back to sleep. If I try to put him down in his bed, he will wake up either immediately or within 15-20 minutes. I wait until he has "limp limbs" and everything before putting him down, it doesn't matter. He is in his best mood and sleeps the best at night if he can get at least two decent naps during the day, usually a couple hrs each. But like I said, I can't put him down for the naps, he won't sleep in the car or while we're out anywhere, etc. The moby-style wrap has been my savior, he will nap while I'm wearing him at home and then I can kind of maybe get a tiny bit done. But he is maybe around 18 lbs now and it is killing my back to wear him so much. (I feel like I have never quite recovered from all the muscle loss during pregnancy bed rest....) I wear him for many naps, I wear him while we're out anywhere because he doesn't like the carseat OR the stroller, and he is just plain getting heavy.

I don't know if anyone has tips... if not, maybe encouragement? Will he ever be able to lay down for naps during the day? He is a very busy, active baby... will he just stop taking naps once I can't carry him the whole time?? Ugh. I'm hoping he outgrows this eventually, but he is almost 6 months old and I am starting to get frustrated.

ETA: I also try nursing him to sleep in my bed, which will sometimes work, but he will only stay asleep if I stay by him and nurse him every time he wakes. This lasts usually an hour, tops. And for what it's worth he sleeps fairly well at night, in his pack n play next to our bed.

ETA 2: I'm sorry, should have included more info... but you know, fussy napless baby was calling. ;-) I have tried swaddling and not (he is still swaddled at night, although loosely), I have tried the swing, I have tried warming up the bed with a rice pack before putting him down. Thanks P101...

A couple things:

1) This is completely off topic, but I am at work so I can’t call about it. :) My boyfriend/unofficial fiance got his “order to settle” for his divorce in the mail today. I’d originally planned to go with him, for moral support, as his ex hasn’t always been the nicest person. I’ve been cleared by my work to go, however I just got to thinking, am I allowed to go into the courtroom with him? I don’t see why not. You can have people go in with you for all sorts of different proceedings, why not this? I know my best source of info would be to call the courthouse, but this is bugging me and I wouldn’t be able to do so until lunch. And this community seems to be a wealth of knowledge. I’m in Central Florida if that matters.

Edited to add: Also, after this court date, would the divorce be final? Or do we still have to wait for a period of time? They have no children or assets to split. It’s an uncontested divorce that they both just want done with.

2) My daughter has co-slept since she was an infant. She turned 3 in October. I’m pregnant, due May 29, 2010. It’s literally driving me crazy during the night. We’ve been trying to transition her into her bed, but nothing is working. We’ve tried to just move her after she’s asleep, but she wakes up the second we pick her up to move her. She screams bloody murder that she’s scared if we tell her to just try and lay down and fall asleep. She swears there are monsters in the house. We moved in early October, so she’s had a couple months to adjust. I really don’t know what else to do. I’m just getting horrible sleep whenever she sleeps in our bed, and there will be absolutely no room when the baby gets here.

Thanks in advance and Merry Christmas!

Thank you all for all the help with the leaky diapers - huggies are THE best!

( some questions about us airways )

My daughter is 11 months old and has thrown up nearly every day of her life. Anything from spit up dribbles to projectile vomit(it's usually closer to the projectile side unfortunately.) She's seen various doctors at her pediatrician's office and at urgent care and apparently this is normal. Anyone else who has had a puker, when did it stop? Ever? Please? I mean, really.
I feel mostly ignored by the doctors, at one point they thought maybe reflux, then no, not reflux then later, oh maybe reflux? I don't know, she's been on 2 different meds for reflux, switched to soy formula, tried giving her cereal and it all just comes back up. I avoid feeding her solids because it's harder for her to get back up and she chokes on it and it freaks me out. Today we gave her some chicken and about 6 hours later she threw up undigested pieces of food. Is this even normal? It doesn't feel like it is, I don't think I'm overreacting.
The doctors aren't concerned because she's not underweight so they keep saying she's fine. I still worry. Especially about what to do in the next couple months, I know we're "supposed to" start giving her whole milk and more solids but if she keeps puking up food I'm obviously not going to want to give it to her. My other concern is about her teeth. I brush them with that baby toothpaste but I am paranoid about it not being good enough, her breath still smells like puke after I clean her mouth. I don't want her to have teeth issues from all the puking too.

Really don't know what to do anymore.

We've tried keeping her vertical after eating, we don't think it's from overfeeding, she doesn't eat a lot at a time and she often dry heaves after getting everything up so if it was overfeeding, I don't think that would happen. She did vomit less after switching her to soy but seems to be able to handle dairy better now.

I've heard of breast feeding strikes, but my nine month old is currently on a food strike.
All he wants to do is nurse.
Both my breasts have started gorging because of his demand for milk.
He had six sharp little teeth...

Has anybody else experienced this?
Should I encourage him to try and eat his baby food?
EDIT:
He has another tooth coming in. :/

my daughter is a year and a half old. and she has hair almost down the the middle of her back, and its getting on the thick side. but ive been noticing that she has a bit of split ends, at this age, what can i do to prevent them? and make them better? right now i use johnson and johnson shampoo+conditioner for curly hair, and afterwords i towel dry it and use johnson and johnson no more tangles leave in conditioner.
i try not to put her hair up in pony tails all the time, i usually just leave it by unless we are going out, or she is eating. and i usually wash it about once a week.

im not at all against using anything to help it out, im trying to take the best care of it as i can, so it keeps shiny and long...

( a picture to give an idea what it looks like )

at what age did you introduce a pillow for your child? 

(my son is 16 months old.  still in the crib for the first part of the night, then comes in with us for the second part of the night to nurse.  we still pull our pillows away from him when he's in our bed so that they are not near his face if he turns his head.)

thanks!

My 2-year-old daughter just did a triple back flip off the couch and landed on her face on the floor. She now has a bloody nose and I can't stop laughing. Seriously. Olympians couldn't perfect that move.

Have you ever laughed at your kid while consoling them because they did something stupid and hurt themselves?

I've recently fallen in love with putting tights on my little girl...they actually stay on and keep her feet warm! But I only a pair I picked up at TCP, and at $5 a pop, feetie pajamas are looking like a much more economical way to dress le babe.

Anyone have the lowdown on where to buy cheap tights for baby girls, or a good lead on somewhere to get them from secondhand?

( Help keep my feet warm! -or- a picture so this isn't a total waste of space for some people... )

i'm surprised this isn't up yet.  it just came out, but usually stuff like this gets up right away.  the insurance institute for highway safety did a study of booster seats, and released their report.  here's the link...  http://www.wmur.com/automotive/22034232/detail.html

 

( here's the text )
ETA: when i did the cut, the format of the text got screwy.  i tried to fix it, but it didn't work.  you can still read it, it's just not "pretty"

Should the average 2.5 year old be able to understand the concept of "being mean"? The concept that hitting/kicking/smacking/yelling at your friends is, in fact, mean?

What are your disciplinary strategies for handling this type of situation?

Is a 2 minute time out and explaining why the time out is happening appropriate?

This is becoming a really huge issue in our home. Our housemate's (extremely smart and verbal) 2.5 year old daughter is only here 3 days a week, and is becoming more and more mean/violent towards our 1 year old daughter. She mostly acts up while her mother is around, and we've tried many different strategies... is following through the key?

Please verify that you can still have a happy peaceful home if there are some rules and discipline too.

So I have this mobile for the babies. I bought it for them last Christmas when they were still sharing a crib. Within a few months the batteries ran out and they were little little at the time, so they didn't care. When they moved to separate cribs, I put it up for decoration on the crib side of one. (The other got this pretty neat sun that lights up.) Well, they're sixteen months now... way beyond the age where a mobile should be amusing. But since they can press the buttons themselves, and it's basically new again (we finally replaced the batteries) they both LOVE IT MORE THAN ANYTHING. So now, they're tantruming every time I try to take them out of their cribs to, you know, eat, or live. And the one that doesn't have the mobile has MOBILE ENVY like you wouldn't believe. And they're not sleeping as well, because they are awake looking at the mobile (they know how to turn it on and everything.)

So, my options are:

1) Take the mobile away entirely and wait out the tantrums sure to ensue.
2) Buy the other one a mobile for Christmas.
3) Take the batteries out of the mobile and wait out the tantrums sure to ensue.
4) Move the mobile to somewhere outside their bedroom... although I'm having trouble coming up with a spot where it would stay put.

Any suggestions?

Newb here, so off the bat I am sorry if I am unwittingly committing any posting sins here.

My 3.5 year old son woke up from his nap today at ~4:30 crying that his stomach hurt. (It should be noted that he is a SUPER tough kid and rarely cries, so when he does I instantly go into crisis mode.) Anyway, the pain progressed and he eventually became near hysterical all the while coughing and puking. This lasted about an hour and a half maybe? Finally I got him to calm down, gave him some tylenol, etc. and he was seemingly okay for a little while. Then at 6:30-7:00-ish he started complaining of the bellyache again and threw up for nearly an hour complaining of pain and not breathing properly from his poor little clenched stomach muscles. All the while he has had a low grade fever. We did some calming activities (deep breathes, rocking, etc.) and he finally calmed down again/ fell asleep but didn't breathe normally the entire time from clenching his stomach muscles. He seems to be somewhat back to normal now- still lethargic- seemingly in (an obviously tolerable amount of) pain.

So my question- WTF!?

My first thought was appendicitis. All his symptoms line up pretty well, and though he cant talk yet (apraxia) he did point to his belly button when I told him to point out exactly where it hurt.

Im guessing since he is able to calm down like this its NOT appendicitis? He had a bm this morning so I know its not constipation... any ideas? Should we head off to the emergency room if he gets another bout tonight or wait until tomorrow to take him to the pedi?

Thanks in advance guys!
Sorry to be so verbose!

I just caved and bought my 4 month old an amber teething necklace. I'm usually skeptical of things like that but right about now I'm willing to try ANYTHINGGGGGGGGGG.

For those of you who have used one, did it work? When did you start seeing a difference? Did you keep it on 24/7?

Also, for anyone that has the fisher price ocean wonders aquarium, is it supposed to be filled right to the top with that liquid inside?? Mine is only slightly over half full, but in the picture on the box it looks pretty much full. To return it or not to return it...that is the question.

Thanks in advance!

I called to book my 6 week appointment with my OB today and they can't take me till February 1st!  She said that all they will be doing is a pap anyway, and get my family doctor to do it, but because of a 2nd degree tear that I think should be redone (WHOLE other story, ugh) I booked for Feb. 1st anyway.  Plus... I don't have a family doctor, just a ped for my son Cole.

Anyway... during labor I apparently tore all of my stomach muscles so there was a "gap" running down from under my breasts to my belly button.  The nurse told me not to pick anything up that was heavier than my son, or even to vacuum for 6 weeks.  I had a normal vaginal delivery, so no C-Section to complicate things.  And I'm BFing, if that relates to anything.  I was expecting that my OB could give me the green light to start working on my jelly belly, or at least let me vacuum, but now since I can't see her till February I am wondering what to do..?

Has anybody had their stomach tear, and how can you tell if it is better enough to exercise / do household chores?  Pretty sure my DH is getting sick of carrying the loads of laundry up and down the stairs LOL

Thanks,
Courtney

We co-sleep but as the time draws near to our second baby arriving we are trying to transition our 18mth old daughter to be put to bed (still in our family bed) by her Dad.

Since she has been breastfed until this last month (no milk currently), I have always nursed her down or laid with her while she drifts off. I haven't minded being responsible for all sleep times because it's my favourite part of the day with her.

However, knowing that I may not be able to put her to bed once I have a newborn as well, we thought it might be a good idea if her Dad starts putting her down.

She *hates* this idea. We have been trying a number of different techniques but none seem to be working. Please oh please spam me with how you get your little one to go down for someone they're not used to.

We have so far tried my husband coming to bed with us and laying on the other side of her so she is used to him being there. Once she was used to him and happily playing with his necklace while she drifted off, I try to leave room. MELTDOWN. We have tried pretending that I am going out in the car so she knows I am not home and my husband putting her to bed as I would. MELTDOWN. We have tried me putting her mostly to sleep and sneaking away. MELTDOWN.

She just *WILL* not go to sleep for him. Suggestions please!

Okay, my husband and I are thinking about homeschooling our daughter next school year for Kindergarten...The main reason is, we dont like the curriculum that the state of GA has set up for K students...The other reasons are that he comes home for RnR in late September for 2 weeks and then we will be moving to Colorado in the middle of the school year and she will miss at least a total of 6 weeks for the school year due to moving and daddy coming home for RnR and then for good, if she goes to a regular school...I am willing to try anything and everything that you suggest!!! So, can you all please spam me with your favorite homeschooling websites and links for good lesson plans etc...I am researching now and would love to be as informed as possible!! Also, does anyone know if they give homeschooling parents materials to use if I was to go talk to the school board? Thank you so much in advance for all of your help!!! For what it is worth, my 4.5 yo is reading beginner books, spelling, knows all of her numbers/shapes/alphabet, and from her pre-k teacher's perspective, should be in K this current year, but she isnt old enough...she is already doing 1st grade workbooks at home when she gets bored (and during nap time at pre-k) so if there are any programs you can help me with, please let me know!!! sorry for the rambling!!